You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
