Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
