I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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