im so drunk with asians
where?
always
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
