all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
