My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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