I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Vodka?
Forever.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
