How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Randomize
