Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
she looked like the before picture.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
