am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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