singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Help me help you realize you are a moron
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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