Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize