this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'm always down for nudity.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize