turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
