When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
