Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
