I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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