You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
