4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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