im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
