She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
