It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
you never un-have a 4some
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
