i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize