I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
