Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
