cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
