Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
two words...techno handjob
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
