The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
