You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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