I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Randomize
