So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
