well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
