she woke up with a sticky ear
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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