Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
