well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
