What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
it was like eating out sand paper
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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