____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
