New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
