My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Randomize
