And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
