that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize