Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
