So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
