last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
How's work?
Spinning.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
