forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
