she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize