It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
