I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
