hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
