I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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