I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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